#8

Dad is in the Lion's Club. There was a meeting on Monday.
Earlier in the afternoon I helped him print off some papers to give to someone and he had placed them in a manilla folder.
He left for the meeting.
Three minutes since he's left, and he walks back in the door.

Me: That was quick.
Dad: I forgot my wallet!
Me: Ha! Okay. Did you get your papers?
Dad: Yep!

He walks back out the door and leaves again.
Five minutes later my phone rings.

Dad: Are those papers there in the office?
I walk to go look...
Me: Yes! I asked you!!! I asked you before you left if you had them!
Dad: I know! I thought I'd put them in the car!
Me: What is wrong with you?!
Dad: I don't know!!!

I happened to be leaving for somewhere so I drove to meet him so he didn't have to come all the way back to the house for his papers that he could've got when he'd come back for his wallet but didn't because he thought he'd already put them in his car, when in fact he'd just imagined that he had.

Poor fella.

#7 - Panda Express Saga

For some reason dad can never remember the name of the fast food restaurant Panda Express.
It's one of his favorite places to eat. He goes maybe three to four times a month.

I first became aware of this particular memory issue a couple months ago when he came to tell me he was going to get something to eat.

Dad: What's the name of that fast food place I like?
Me: {blank stare} - I don't know. What fast food place?
Dad: {stares at ceiling, trying to remember} - That Chinese place.

I immediately know what he's talking about, but I like to give him memory exercises so I start to question him.

Me: That place has an animal associated with it.
Dad: Uh-huh. {squints, trying to remember}
Me: What is China's national animal, Dad?
Dad: {the light bulb goes off, excitement ensues} The panda!!! Panda Express!!!

A month later...

He walks over to me with a twinkle in his eye. I think, "Oh, God. What now?"
Dad: I'm going to that place I like. {twisty face trying to remember the name}
Me: {Amused} Uh-huh. What's the name of it?
Dad: Uhhh. The place with the fuzzy bear on the door.

I busted up laughing.

Me: Really?! Really? You're ridiculous.
Dad: I'm just kidding. It's Panda Express. But I couldn't remember it earlier...

Then tonight:

With that same mischevious, goofy, twinkle all over his face,
Dad: I'm going out to eat!
Me: {Smiling, playing along, wondering what ridiculousness is coming next} Where to?
Dad: The kay-oh-la bear restaurant!
Me: {Laughing} Oh. My. Gosh.
Dad: No, I remember. But I couldn't earlier, all I could think of was kay-oh-la bear.

The gold in this exchange is that he was pronouncing koala bear, "kay-oh-la".

I didn't correct him. Didn't want to overload his poor brain. Not really. I'm just hoping he uses it in public elsewhere. :)

#6

Dad just got home from church.

Dad: Come here! Do you hear that?!
Me: What?

He's stepping slowly in the kitchen, staring at his shoes, a rubbery shoe meeting tile floor noise accompanies the movement.

Dad: That! These are new shoes! What the heck!
Me: Hmm. That's weird.

He's rocking back and forth on one foot, every time he rocks the shoe the rubber noise is there, though as I'm staring at the shoe the sound doesn't seem to fit. I move closer to inspect and realize the sound is not coming from his shoe, but from a higher place. As he's moving his body to rock on his feet, his hips are also moving...

Me: Aha! Your belt!

I assumed his leather belt was making the squeak noise. It seemed to be coming from thereabout that place, but this is also weird...

Dad: Ohhhhhh!

He looks at me and smiles sheepishly and proceeds to pull a small styrofoam dinner plate out of his back dress pants pocket.

Me: {I put on my "Are you serious?" face.}
Dad: I was in a rush to do the [video]console for church, so I just grabbed some food before going up there. People were milling around after church and I couldn't just walk down there with a dirty styrofoam plate in my hand.
Me: There's not a trash can up there?  (The console is on a second story balcony in the church, the congregation sits down below.)
Dad: Nope.
Me: How do you forget about a folded up dinner plate in your back pocket?
Dad: I don't know.
Me: ...{Shakes head.}